I Am #AliveAndThriving Today! || #IAmAliveChallenge || Daily Off-Grid Jungle Journal Entry: Day #564 - Assorted Tuesday Thoughts - GaiaYoga Gardens, Lower Puna, Far East Big Island, Hawai'i - Monday, February 12, 2024

I live naked and barefooted, very close to Earth and Nature, in an 18-acre, off-grid, clothing-optional, food-forest intentional community (GaiaYoga Gardens), way out in the jungles of Lower Puna, far East Big Island, Hawai'i, and I have for more than 5 years now. Although there are many challenges, I love my life, and I'm immensely grateful to live where and how I do, on my own terms! I would not want to live any other way! 😁🙏💚⚡💥🔥✴️✳️❇️👣🌱✨🤙

Warm greetings all! 😁🙏💚✨🤙

From time to time, like today, I don't have one specific topic to discuss in these posts, but rathar a hodgepodge of thoughts, ideas, emotions, and perspectives, that are swirling around inside of me this morning. Whether this is more or less interesting for my readers, I cannot say, though that's how it's flowing today. Some days I just have tidbits of this or or that to say, without wanting to go into any great depth in any one subject.

I see people talking on Qortal, DeSo, and Bastyon, about the challenges around generating any substantial usable income on those allied blockchains, and I just keep thinking how grateful that I am to have found and gone all in on Hive as I did 2 1/3 years ago. I deeply appreciate and support all of those sovereignty-driven blockchains, but Hive still blows them all out of the water in terms of its income-generating potential, and it's already-existing actuality. That may not always be the case, as these other blockchains are developing quickly, but that's the truth of things at the moment. Hive is still the most elegant, efficient, and useful version of a financial system that I've ever seen.

Healing my broken heart, and changing my perspective about myself, and what's possible in my life, is really not easy. Yes, I've made some headway and progress here, and a bit more is beginning to move and flow in my life, in bits and pieces here and there, but I still feel so much unwillingness and resistance inside of myself, from wounded parts that still feel bitterness and resentment. I still mostly stay to myself, talking to people only if they say something to me first. I'm such a living, breathing contradiction and paradox.

It's a sunny, warm, and breezy day here in the jungle today, which is nice, and I also slept well last night, so I feel good in my body. Even with that, however, I don't feel actually happy or fulfilled, because I have no close human connections or relationships, and no feeling of shared purpose, mission, or passion with the people with whom I live. I mostly just focus on Hive, and the needed tasks on the land each day, not generally giving time to people. That, of course, really doesn't work, or feel good, but it is how things are presently.

Amelia, a young woman who used to live here at GaiaYoga Gardens (she's one woman that always loved being naked as much as I did, which I always deeply appreciated), just scheduled a session with me for Thursday afternoon. So that will be my second session this month. It's so funny to me how, even after months of not giving sessions, that once one woman decides to get a session with me, there is often a string of other women doing the same very soon after, even when there is no connection or communication (at least not outwardly) between them. I've worked with Amelia many times, both when she lived here at GYG, and afterward when she would come here specifically for sessions. Other potential sessions have also been bubbling up, so more will likely be scheduled soon.

My sessions with women are an example of the glaring contradictions in my life, as I am good at creating safe space for women, to do deeply intimate and vulnerable healing work with them, and yet I feel utterly broken around women, and I have no close connections or relationships with any at all. It's a 'my greatest wound is my greatest gift' kind of thing. Honestly, I'm a life-long goddess worshiper that unfortunately feels completely powerless to create anything that I actually want with women...except in sessions, where I know I'm good at what I do, and I have a sincere desire to help, so it usually flows well. Crazy, sad stuff indeed.

Yesterday, Monday, I left the Flow House just before 3PM, after wrapping up my essential Hive tasks. I put my attention on taking photos for this post, before land work. With photo taking mostly done, I collected three Melochia logs, two being quite large, from cow-food collecting last week, and carried them to the shop, to be processed. After moving the logs, I decided to strain out my kefir-honey-cinnamon-cacao blend early again, as I like getting it done earlier in the day. One more-satisfying thing that I did was to get more plants in the ground along the path going to the Flow House, as well as in pockets of soil up on the lava, near the Flow House.

I've been checking in with Sperry most days, and helping him, after his injury last week. I've also been concocting some healing elixirs to assist his recovery process. Melekai picked up a couple items in town yesterday for Sperry, which I prepared and gave to him this morning.

After helping Sperry yesterday, I made myself some food, grabbed my leftover superfood fire coffee, then I headed back to the Flow House, for my evening round of Hive tasks and catching up on notifications. Being Monday, there was a community logistics meeting, that I did not attend, which has become my norm as of late. I was able to finish up everything on Hive by 9:15AM, and after some token management, and scanning my X feed, I went to bed around 10:30PM. Since I got almost no sleep the night before, super thankfully I did sleep well, as I mentioned above, waking up around 8AM, doing a quick round of token management, and then getting out of bed around 8:30AM to go make my superfood fire coffee.

It's just before 1:45PM, so a great time to end this post, so that I can get to my afternoon round of essential Hive tasks, and then leave the Flow House in the later afternoon to do land work. I thankfully already took photos in the morning for the next version of this post, so that's done for the day. I deeply appreciate you all very much! Until tomorrow! Forward, onward, and upward, joyfully together! 😁 🙏 💚 ✨ 🤙

2024 Life Goals

1.) Heal my broken heart. 

2.) Bring myself and my life back into balance, integration, and wholeness, and do regular integral practices. 

3.) Make my plant nursery beautiful again. 

4.) Prepare regular batches of my medicinal teas collected from the land again. 

5.) Continue my work with Arch Linux, Hive, Qortal, DeSo, Bastyon, and other sovereignty-driven technologies, as well as learn relevant coding/programming languages to more fully contribute. 

6.) Get regular healing sessions with women flowing again. 

All photos were taken with my Motorola G Power Android Phone.

Thank you all so much who have helped me get to where I am today, and allowing me to share more of the beauty and magic from my life and my world with you, and for your continuous appreciation and support! I am truly deeply grateful! 😁🙏💚✨🤙

If you'd like to find me on other alternative platforms where I have accounts (I spend most of my time here on Hive), click on this signature image below to go to my LinkTree page.

If you'd like to send me a BTC Lighting Tip (made possible by the fantastic work of brianoflondon on @v4vapp), just scan the QR image below. 👇

Signature image created by @doze, and the dividers made by @thepeakstudio, with all tweaked to their present form by me.